A few days ago, I had a lovely follower of mine drop me an email asking what I do to overcome the distance. While reading her email I realized oh shit… Of the almost ten months I’ve been writing this blog never once have I made a post about one of the most important topics of a long distance relationship…the distance itself.
- Keep yourself busy!
This is my biggest piece of advice. ALWAYS be busy. Personally, I have three jobs, I’m definitely a gym rat, I work on His First Mate constantly and I always try to make time for my family. I have very little time to sit and pity the distance.
If you are busy, you’re mind is elsewhere and there is less time to sit there and think about all the miles between you and your SO. What is something you have always wanted to do? Have you always wanted to rock climb? Learn to cook? Is there a book you’ve been meaning to read for the past year that’s gathering dust on your bookshelf? Do you want to go back to school? Stop sitting on the couch, wallowing over the distance. Get up and go do something for YOURSELF.
I can’t ever stress this enough. Just because your SO has left does not mean your life should ever stop. Build yourself. Grow. Keep yourself busy and the time will go by faster because there won’t be as much time to be sad. Time flies when you’re having fun, right?
2. Instead of feeling sad over the distance, celebrate the love.
It’s easy to look at the bleak side of things and feel sad over them. Challenge yourself to look at the positives. You are sad about the distance… because you have someone so amazing to love and miss, who loves you too and who is doing one of the most honorable things a person can do; serving this country. Celebrate that! You have found love which is something a lot of people cannot say. And not only that but you have found love in someone you can be proud of and show off. And how cool is that?!?!
Spend time to let your SO (and the rest of the world) know that! Make them adorable care packages, send them lots of cards, post on Facebook, get involved in military milso groups, literally anything you can do to focus on the positives of the relationship. Instead of having them wake up to a bunch of depressing “I’m not sure I can do this, I miss you too much, etc.” text have them wake up to a list of all the reasons you love them. Focus on everything that makes the distance WORTH it. Be a source of positivity and positive things will come your way.
3. Lean on their family
If you are as lucky as me, you might be pretty close with your SO’s family. Taylor’s family is just like Taylor. They have the same mannerisms, same looks, they say the same things at times, same personality traits. So, being around his family makes me feel a lot better because it is like being around Taylor.
Besides that, they get it. Their child/brother/sister has left them too. They understand what it’s like to have a part of them missing and to say goodbye. Connect with that. It helps to remind yourself that you aren’t alone in missing them.
4. Create a support system for yourself
If you followed tip number three you are already half way there. Your SO’s family can be a great support but you need more. This is one of the reasons I started this blog to begin with. Not only did it mold my two passions of writing and photography but it also opened the door for me to connect with other people exactly like me. If you are not much of a blogger, there are tons of Facebook groups and pages you can join where, mostly girls, post about situations they are going through. Connect with those people! Create a circle of support you can lean on whenever the distance becomes too much. A circle of people that understand what you are going through and can relate to you. This is key.
It sounds kind of awful but it’s important to not think about the distance. Give yourself all the necessary tools for when it does start to get to you but build a strong base for yourself so you can stand on your own.